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Why Dating a Sensitive Man Could Transform Your Relationship Forever

Why Dating a Sensitive Man Could Transform Your Relationship Forever

It’s uncomfortable to admit wanting to date a weak man, especially when society promotes the idea of men being strong and dominant. Wanting a weak man doesn’t mean desiring someone inferior, but rather reflects subconscious desires. The desire for a weak man often stems from an underlying need for support and presence in a relationship. In the past, this caused frequent conflicts in my marriage as I wanted my husband to be more present and supportive, leading me to perceive him as weak when he didn’t meet these expectations. This led to feelings of anger and frustration when he didn’t assert himself or adhere to certain demands.

In short, I hated him for being weak and adaptable

I got tired of feeling like I always had to be strong, thinking I was the main support in my marriage. So, I decided to make a change. I realized that if I wanted things to be different, it had to start with me. I couldn’t change my husband or force him to change. By focusing on the benefits of my current situation, I could understand my role and why things were the way they were. Eventually, I came to the conclusion that I was subconsciously seeing my husband as weak because there were advantages for me in our relationship.

– Got tired of feeling like always having to be strong
– Realized needed personal change for new things
– Couldn’t change spouse or force changes
– Focusing on benefits helped understand role and situation
– Subconsciously saw husband as weak due to personal advantages.

I am in control of everything

If I see my husband as weak, I convince myself that I have to be strong. So, I take control because I believe he won’t. I keep telling myself that I have to handle everything because he doesn’t understand what needs to be done. That’s why I do things my way! When he challenges me and refuses to do things my way, I remind him of his weakness. I bring up all the times he let me down and didn’t support me. As long as I view him as weak, I give myself permission to control everything and feel like there’s no other choice. The more control I want, the more easily convinced I am that he is weak.

Feeling strong

Until recently, I struggled with my partner’s perceived weakness. It was difficult for me to admit this about him or myself. I could never accept my own weaknesses, so when I saw him as weak, it made me feel strong. Whenever he seemed tired or wanted to take a break, I pushed myself to keep going. When he became quiet in conversations, I felt the need to keep them going. As our children were growing up, I ended up being the stricter parent while he let them do as they pleased. His perceived weakness allowed me to see myself as strong and superior.

Feeling Superior

When I’m not ready to face my own weaknesses and don’t want to admit that I’m human, I hold onto my husband’s weaknesses. By repeatedly labeling him as deficient, it makes me feel superior. As someone who always maintains control, is strong, and never stops, I see myself as the better half of our relationship. I believe I’m the most involved parent, the best partner, and the superior person overall. In this mindset, I give myself permission to speak poorly of him and belittle him. Usually not through words but rather with passive-aggressive behaviors and tones. For instance, ignoring him, interrupting him, and criticizing him a lot. Ultimately in these interactions, I see myself as big while he seems small.

I can blame him

When I see him as weak and myself as strong, it’s easy to blame him for my exhaustion. But the truth is, if I view him as deficient, I have to take on his responsibilities along with mine. By shouldering everything and carrying all of our family’s obligations, I convince myself that I am the strongest. However, when one person takes on all the work and responsibilities become too much, their life starts falling apart. They become worn out and eventually reach burnout.

In this role, I overextend my own strength and quickly reach my limits. In reality, I’m too busy taking care of others and our obligations to make time for myself. I’ve convinced myself that he is too weak to take care of our family and me – that he can’t do everything I do or even take care of himself. So, it gives me a good excuse to blame him and reject any responsibility.

I tell myself it’s his fault that I’m so tired and don’t have time to take care of myself.

I see it as the problem

When I see my husband as the weak link in our relationship, I tend to blame him for the lack of improvement in our marriage. I feel like he’s the cause of our fading emotional connection. I believe that if he were more assertive, he would be more involved in conflicts, help out more around the house, and be more romantic. In my mind, these are the weaknesses of our marriage.
Since he doesn’t do what he’s supposed to do, I see him as the problem. As long as I view him this way, I don’t feel like I need to work on myself unless he changes. It feels like a relief not having any obligation to improve myself!

When you see your partner as weak, there are advantages, even if it’s not something you’d admit. It’s like the angel and devil on your shoulders, I want to be the angel and see my husband as the devil. But really, he’s just human, with strengths and weaknesses like me. Admitting our flaws helps us grow together. By accepting our humanity, we can have open conversations about how to improve. This approach allows me to see my husband as an equal partner, recognizing both his strengths and weaknesses. Now I don’t view him as weak; instead, I see him as a strong person and a valuable partner.

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